Webb household sagas

[philandkris]

Seeing as Gazza was venting thought I would share my dilemmas/soap opera last month or so:

1. Undertaking a 4-day round trip to Albany GA nest week, to appear as wintesses for them against their eldest son for a restraining order. 50 years old and still expects his folks to pick up and pay for his "wonderful" decisions. Not looking forward to the two longs drives. Then my SIL who is coming with us, wants to bring her piddling chihuahua with us - my dog doesn't even ride in our car, just the truck. Advised Kris that if dofg comes, she will be driving with her sister and I will be staying home. SIL didn't even ask - just expected it was OK. My in-laws are a little different!!!!!!!

2. My folks called Sunday - mum's memory issues finally diagnosed - part of her brain that controls memory (and she could not tell me exactly) is now only 2/3rds the size and cells it should be. It is not Alzheimers and the Dr said she will go downhill eventually, but could not give a time. I have pushed back my vacation home from August to December - I thought Christmas would be nice and especially with mum now with this diagnosis. I approached my work partner who always takes Christmas vacation, figuring if I appraoched this early and with a compassionate reason, she would agree to change for this year (the policy here is based on seniority for your first choice of vacation time, not take turns each year - SUCKS!). She went ahead straight after my meeting and put in for Christmas vacation:biatch: - my boss is going to try to get it approved, but I either cancel my trip or resign (not a realistic option). Plus my US family is so preoccupied with their own family dramas, that noone is even worried about my feelings to get home ASAP.


Thanks for listening.


In addition, my grandson's fanily is moving to West Virginia (Beckley) at the end of the month, so I wil lbe missing him badly when they leave!!!!

[Jacaranda]

Sorry you're having a tough time of it Phil! :hugging:

Is the Christmas policy a written one or a 'it's always been that way' policy? Is the employer with the church that you preach at? If so, that is a very unchristain way to act!

I'd be telling your wife to tell her sister that she is welcome on the trip but the dog will need a dogsitter.

And I know how much is sucks to not be near your grandchildren. :( Hope things improve for you soon!

[philandkris]

Thanks Jacaranda - employer is the hospital and it is written policy! My two churches are very flexible, especially when it comes to family! I think my co-worker has been told that she needs to change - she hasn't spoken to me for two days (and that is not a bad thing!!!!!).

[Jacaranda]

Well whomever is approving the vacation can decline her request surely? I take all things into consideration when making those decisions.

Hopefully you'll get more days of silent bliss! lol

[Gazza63]

Gee Phil....makes my problems seem so petty. Sorry mate :)

Sending positive thoughts for the holiday etc etc

[aurora]

Dear Phil, hope the Christmas thing works out. It sucks being far away from family at a time like this. :hugging:

[TwoUp]

210Mate I have no sollution for your mum but I will put her in my prayers tonight and you for the vacation time - meanwhile I have a solution for the piddly chihuahua - I recommend you buy this before next time you meet up with the SIL

[TwoUp]

don't ask me why but it doesn't show here but when you click on it you see the image anyway hope it makes you smile

[Leah]

Sorry for the rough times Phil. Hang in there. I hope everything is resolved sooner rather than later.

[matt]

Sorry to hear of your ongoing problems Phil, pity it isn't legal to kill co-workers! I think TwoUp might have something with that wetsuit mate.

[greymare]

Phil, mate, i think its time to put your foot down. sometimes we have to chuck a wobbly to get heard. Especially when "we" have been so accommodating. (you know what I mean). I suggest, being the "forgiving " person that you are, that those around you just dont consider your feelings to be an issue, because you havent clarified them. Its not their fault either,, its just that you are so easy going, (Im guessing here!), that usually you are content to take a back seat, as it were. This is IMPORTANT to you........just be firm and say,........this is unacceptable......(regards the piddling pooch), make other arrangements or find alternative transport for the WEE ONE
same with your employer, Unacceptable, you have a genuine family concern, and its not like you can just shoot over for the weekend and see how things are. I wouldnt want you to lose your job, (God forbid), but sometimes, YOU have to come first. State you case with the manager.......and pray , I will be praying for you.(and your mum).
It was pointed out to me recently that without even being aware of it, we, (esp Aussies) are so easy going, that we let others take the initiative, or we put their needs first, and while that is wonderful, we have to make a real effort then, when its something that is especially important to us. Then, (if you are like me) you feel guilty that you have put other people out, but its not the case, its just that sometimes some people mistake our kindness for weakness.....................Sending you hugs and prayers.

[RollyTG]

Hang in there Phil. Would a video conference type thing be an alternative to driving to Georgia? Don't die in a ditch over the Christmas holiday thing - it's not worth losing your job over. Just go at the earliest time that suits you mate. Flights are more expensive at Christmas anyway. Good luck mate.

[philandkris]

Thanks everyone - you guys are so supportive!!!!!! I think many of you will never know what this site does for me.

Yes, I am very easy going...since mid-teens, I have been the one to say "yes" and help when I can...guess why it lead me to ministry.

Rolly - thanks for the video conference advice, but I think being it is a restraining order, we need to be there - plus we need to see what is actually going on.

I am at the stage where I am going to say I will not drive to Georgia - I was told I "volunteered" to do this - another case where I am too easygoing....in reality, I was first asked if I coudl get two days off work, which I knew I could, plus I don't want to be away from Kris, plus a four-day break would be good for me at the moment.

Gazza....you have a family to support and we are "rooting" for your houses to come together....my issues will resolve too.

Thanks to all my MUO mates, again, you guys are awesome.

I am taking a serious look at my whole life....something I haven't done for so long.....with a year of school to go, I may wait until May next year, and then return home.

[Sinn]

Hey Phil, sorry to hear that you're going through some tough sh!t ATM.

Don't you just love it when you're "volunteered" for stuff then told after the fact. I'd put my foot down over the pissing pooch. If your dog doesn't get to travel in the car why should her mangy mutt.

If you can't get your holidays at Chrissy don't sweat it. I know a trip home then would be kinda special but just remember a trip home to see family is special no matter what time of the year you go.

[NeilG]

Sorry to hear your story Phil. I agree with Greymare. I have come across quite a few people here who initially take my easy going Australian attitude of "she'll be right" as one of weakness. They soon realise that is not the case.

Your hassles with in-laws interests me because I too have a few problems in that area. My wifes siblings and their wives/husbands have been hard to deal with almost since day one. Silly thing is Mother in law thinks the sun shines out of my bum as did father in law before he passed away last year.

It must be something in the water.

[philandkris]

Update.....pissy dog is staying home......yeah!!!!!!!!

Christmas vacation I am sittign tight - my boss is trying his best to help me. Sinn - thanks for the holiday advice - I thought it would be nice for Clay to experience Christmas and Webb family Boxing Day!!!!

[robyn48]

Common sense has prevailed. Although I do love chihuahuas.

[aussiechicka]

Thinking of you Phil, sorry you are having a rough time.

[Gazza63]

Let me know if she needs two more pissy chihuahua - I have two I need to sort out!

[TwoUp]

I think chihuahua's are nasty - but on another note Phil - hang in there - you have to remmeber God has a plan and sometimes it's all for a good reason why a Biatch stuffs up your plans - God might have put her there for a reason. Man I don't like chihuahau's why don't you give some to this woman?

[robyn48]

C'mon all you fellow chihuahua lovers....stand up for the poor little misunderstood guys. How could you not love this face?

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[Smudge]

Hands up for me to, Robyn.

Love all kinds of dogs, and think the owners are at fault, not the dogs.

[aurora]

Love all kinds of dogs, and think the owners are at fault, not the dogs.
We have the absolutely nicest neighbours ever...and they have two psychotic chihuahuas....definitely cannot always blame the people.

[robyn48]

Some people may think they are girlie dogs, but my ex husband loved them and he was 6'2 and played VFL football.

[matt]

Any dog you can fit in a handbag is a girlie dog...even if it's psyco. :D

[philandkris]

The prob with my SIL's dog is that he has never been trained, crate-trained, street sense trained at all.

Gazza, can't help you with the 2 chihuahua problem!!!!!

Personally, I love all animals, but they are still ugly!!!!

[tanya]

my grandmother with her chihuahua, buffy. gran rescued him from the pound, where he was minutes from being put down. we think he was accidentally left behind by tourists passing through the town. he wasnt chipped though, so there was no way to trace his owner/s. gran got him at a good time for her; it gave her a couple more years, after the deaths of her two youngest sons, and of her old dog (which none of us liked)...

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and "brutus the killer chihuahua" real name candy. we got her from friends who had never been allowed to have pets as children, so had no idea how to look after a dog. they had her living waaaaay down their back yard, and only interracted with her when it was feed time. fortunately for candy, they were moving interstate, so we took her. she was the sweetest dog ever, would lick everyone to death. she'd walk with me to the shop, but demanded to be carried home so she could gaze upon her kingdom, lol!!!

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[Gazza63]

I love my chihuahuas...i just wish they would stop pissing and crapping EVERYWHERE! The hardest dogs in the world to potty train...

[philandkris]

:yeahthat: We must wonder why they are so crazy!!!! But, just like Tanya posted, many people love the fugly little buggers...just not me!